Work on you, for you

Nowadays our attention is often directed in various directions. This can make it really easy to lose focus on the person who matters the most: ourselves. It is really important to reflect on your self-growth, well-being, and happiness. During the daily grind, it can be hard to find time for this, but it is really important to make time for yourself. In today’s society, there can be a lot of pressure to maintain the many external expectations. This may make you strive for external validation as well, constantly seeking the approval and praise from others, and also measuring ourselves to others. That need of external validation will trap you in a never-ending cycle, which in my opinion is a big cause for unhappiness. When you work on you, for you, you’ll develop your authenticity, resilience, and inner peace, which will help you dealing with the ever-changing external circumstances. Working on you, for you, is of course a very personal journey. When I read these words myself, it really got me thinking about what this means to me.

External or internal expectations, the journey of personal growth is a never-ending one for me. You’ll never stop growing, whether you’re 18 or 80 years old. Every single day you could learn something new, experience something else, or get some new insights. The thing with letting your personal growth be decided by external factors, will make it a really chaotic journey. You cannot decide or control what will happen externally. What you can control, are your own actions and reactions, and in someway also your thoughts. Why would you let something so unreliable as external factors decide on how your personal growth story will be written? I’d rather rely on what I can control for my personal growth. But that is a very hard thing to do.

In this day and age, we can get influenced by external factors a lot, which of course also makes it very easy to make strive for the validation from others as well. Shouldn’t it be more important to prioritize our own validation? Then we should decide to prioritize internal expectations over external expectations. But how? That is different for everyone. I started thinking about which external factors are influencing my personal growth right now. Can I cut some of these factors off?

One example is that I started using social media way more again. I don’t know if it has become an addiction, but I could do with less. I’m not saying that social media is bad, but it has become a huge part of today’s society, probably way too huge. It is not weird to think that something that is a big part of our lives, is also influencing our thoughts a lot. We all know the stories about how social media creates these perfect life images, and how a lot of people compare themselves to these images. It is a big cause of depressions. What when people would cut social media off? Then I think it will become way easier to only compare you to yourself.

Because that is what “working on you, for you” means to me: you compare you to yourself, to create the best version of yourself. It’s the constant need for improving yourself, but then only for yourself, not being affected by the approval of others. Of course there are also be a lot of other external factors, of which you would like approval. These are probably way harder to overcome as well, but know that you cannot control the opinions of others. They can change every single second. So why worry about them when it comes to your personal growth? You can control your own thoughts, actions, and reactions. Seek your own approval. Work on you, for you.

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